Thursday, June 08, 2006 ♥
Feel no motivation to play maple le. LOL.
I finish my stuff early today, so can blog early and probably sleep early. It's been days since I last slept well. Been really busy. I want my holidays. But then, holidays means no school and no school means no company which is sad ar. LOL.
Seems like my forum is going on well. Not bad. Hahaha. But glad got some contact with the outside world like Irddy, Tedo, Robin, Ekin and JingSi la. LOL.
Have job to do tml le. LOL. Hopefully I can learn. Well, heng got people just now also listening, haha. Hope tomorrow I got problems can ask ask around. If not later Andrew not there le I also die. Wonder why we like chiong a lot of work ar? LOL.
I think I finally can rest in peace on YaoWei's case la. LOL. It's time to take my leave. He know wat he's gonna do and everything's going on well. Just hope he wouldn't mood swing that often.
I hope I dun mood swing much as well. Metta, wish me courage.
Tomorrow not meeting Amanda they all le. Sad. I rejected so many friends just coz of my best friends le. Then all suddenly piang sei. Saddening.
Well, we kinda like go down for a visit in the school, and I super happy to see Irddy, Melvin, his girlfriend and Tedo. I practically like run into the room lor. Haha. I just miss them all. Being with them is fun that I dun really have to think much about my problems. It's like an escape from my problems for a while, while having fun at the same time! lol. Ate lunch in the canteen. Somehow like taste better then before le. Or am I imagining things? I think I miss school too much la. I NEVER MISS NYP BEFORE YOU KNOW!! Omg! LOL.
Kinda share things with YaoWei, and Melvin. Kinda like, hurt. Know it's dumb but, maybe I was wrong all along. I'm so sorry.
So I guess I should give it up and move on. Seems sad. But I'll survive. Haha. Sure I'm a girl, but still I will survive. I've always survived. I survived so many times. But it still fucking hurt. Letting go? I didn't even try anything. Like my brother said, I'm dumb to shed tears for this guy who doesn't really know I cared.
I gotta be stronger.
Everyone seems to have their source of happiness around them. Seems like I'm the only one who dunno where my happiness is. Maybe I should just go back to my no life. Only work. Maybe I wouldn't think too much? hahaha. Wanna say that I dun really care but I know I can't bluff myself la.
Wonder when will I watch the stars again with a love one? lol.
I dunno wat I should feel anymore.
calwen @ 8:55 PM